Newton Stewart, Wigtown and Whithorn RC Churches

Catholic Churches in the Machars of Galloway

Returning to the Father’s Heart: the meaning of a “good confession.”

Returning to the Father’s Heart: the meaning of a “good confession.”

 

The parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15: 11-32) tells us so powerfully what confession is all about. First it tells us what our normal way of living should be: to live in the company of God the Father and our brethren, in peace, love and joy. It is to this that the prodigal son longs to return. The parable then explains the nature of sin (all sin, any sin): it is the need to assert ourselves by leaving the company and love of the Father. There is a kind of ingratitude here, an indifference to the Father and to others, a selfish and proud statement of self-sufficiency and independence. It is the use of our freedom not to deepen our love for the Father and for each other, but to break away, to break the bonds of true love for the wrong kind of self-love. Notice how the Father lets the son go. He does not force his freedom, for he knows that forced love is no love. Nor does the Father hold back in giving his son what he (the Father) had set aside for him. The prodigal son leaves with all he has and all he is. It is a total break with God.

 

Soon, the appeal of independence and doing what he liked showed itself up as the sham that it always was. Breaking with God can seem very attractive … but it only “seems” so. Distance from God (the son went to a “distant country”) leads to the waste of oneself, both of what one has (“he spent all his money”) and of what one is (he became as low as a pig, not even eating what they had to eat). Sin distorts one’s true sense of self. You begin to think about yourself in illusory ways: first the initial gush of independence which falsifies the fact that you cannot live without the Father; then you lose your dignity, for not only did the son work with the pigs, he told himself that he “no longer deserved to be called” a son of the Father. Sin is a waster and devastator! With sweet seduction it steals not only money, not only time, not only energy and peace, but one’s deepest and truest self.

 

In some ways the prodigal son was fortunate, for had he not lost everything, he might well have stayed away. When we think we can hack it fine without God, such an illusion is perhaps even more dangerous than when we hit the gutter, for hitting the gutter at least reveals the truth. The parable says that the son “came to his senses.” It is not sensible to sin. It is irrational. It is not worthy of intelligent beings. The son’s self-awareness had been put to sleep by sin. Misery roused him to the truth. It is true that the son’s hunger was the first thing to move him. But God is glad even if our motives for returning to him are, at least initially, pretty basic. Still, the parable says that he remembered “his father’s house.” Sin had not completely destroyed the memory of the Father. God’s presence to us is always deeper than sin, but he wants us to become present to that presence. It is our conscience which God often uses to bring us to our senses. It complains at the damage we are doing to ourselves because of our distance from God. The sudden awareness which the son regained of his Father and of his own plight was a gift of the Spirit, the same Spirit who had fostered that peace and joy which the son had known in his Father’s house.

 

And so, the son provides himself with words to return to the Father. He has examined his conscience, and has found words to express both the folly of his actions and his sorrow for them. But note also that he has not lost total confidence in his Father, even if he thinks that his Father might only want to take him back as a servant. His trust in the Father was mightily shaken, but not destroyed. Indeed, so long as we have life, God will always seek to preserve in us the memory of himself. He will always seek inroads into our deepest self.

 

Note what the parable says about the Father. He is anxiously awaiting his son’s return. He has not given up hope. God does not say “good riddance” to us when we sin. He awaits with “patient impatience” for us to return. The Father sees the son “while he is still a long way off.” How moving! How hope-inspiring! How confidence-giving! Not only that. The Father runs – yes, runs!- towards the returning son. He has perceived the distress of the son; he knows the pain he is experiencing, the pain of failure, of humiliation, of effort to return. Note that the Father still recognizes his son as his son. No distortion by sin can cloud the Father’s eyes to who we truly are. In what must surely be the most moving moment of all, the Father throws himself on his son’s neck and kisses him tenderly. What profound humanity of God! It is heart-breaking because it is so beautiful. The son begins to make his confession. The parable gives the impression that the Father almost ignores it because he is beside himself with joy! Indeed, there is greater joy in heaven for one who repents than for ninety-nine who are, they think, “just.” The Father’s orders to the servants are urgent: quick, kill the fattened calf; quick, bring a ring and the finest cloak’ quick, we must celebrate! The Father cannot wait to celebrate us: no remonstrations, no finger-pointing.

 

My friends, the sacrament of reconciliation or confession is, if you like, a ritual form of this parable. But its substance is the same. The steps of which it consists are more or less the same. Of course, what Jesus does not say in the parable, but what is obviously true, is that we are only able to have access to the Father because of Jesus’ death and resurrection. It is Christ who has made it possible for every prodigal son or daughter to return to the Father’s house. In this sacrament we anticipate in grace what will, we hope, be our definitive return to the Father’s house beyond death. In the here and now of our life, we need to experience again and again this truth of the Father’s mercy in Jesus, because we constantly need to be purified from the deceit and illusion into which sin wants to insert us. Original sin happened only once, and that is why baptism only takes place once. But personal sin, alas, is something we can often repeat, and so we often need to seek forgiveness from it in the sacrament of confession. I can only encourage you to make use of this immense gift of the mercy of God. The Lord wants us to live, not to die! But the choice is ours.

 

Steps to follow before, during and after the sacrament:

 

+ Before you do anything, spend a little time alone with the Father, thanking Him for all that he has given, gives and will give you, particularly any special thing that comes to mind. Tell Him you love Him.

+ Pray for the Light of the Holy Spirit to see and to admit any thought, word, deed or omission which has led you to abandon the Father’s heart, in small or in big ways. You can call this an “examination of conscience.” Keep the 10 commandments in mind; remember the love of God above all and of neighbour as self. Don’t be afraid either of your sins or of the consequences of admitting them (e.g. the effort involved in breaking with sin, in trying to overcome them with grace, love and, yes, sheer effort). Especially be not afraid of the priest: he is there to assure you of the Father’s forgiveness. He loves you in the Father’s name and for the Father’s sake. Jesus has invested him with His own authority to forgive. He represents both Christ and the Church.

+ On meeting with the priest, make the sign of the Cross. The priest may say a word of welcome or blessing. If not, just begin as you wish (you can use a formula like, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned, it has been such-and-such a time since I last confessed, and these are my sins ….” – but don’t use it if it does not help you: the main point is that you are there!). Don’t worry if you can’t recall every detail! Say all that you can remember at the moment. The priest will then offer you some words of advice and encouragement; he may ask a question if something is not clear; just respond honestly and simply. Then he will give you a penance, i.e. a symbolic prayer or deed to perform as a sign of your repentance (the penance is done after you have left the priest). He will then ask you to make an “act of contrition.” This is a prayer to God expressing sorrow for the sins confessed and the resolution not to sin again. You can either use a formula for this, or your own words. If you’re stuck, the priest will help you. He will then give you absolution from you sins. By absolution, Christ through the priest makes your soul as beautiful as it was the day you were baptized. He does this by “reimmersing” you in the power of his death and resurrection!

+On leaving the priest, I suggest you take a moment of prayer to thank the Lord for this immense gift of grace. Imagine the Father celebrating a feast of joy for you in the Kingdom. Just enjoy it. Just rejoice to be free from the misery of sin, to be restored to your full dignity in the Father’s sight, to feel and know you belong once more in His heart.

+ Fulfill your penance as soon as you can. Do it consciously as part of the sacrament.

+ Take some time soon after the sacrament to find practical ways of putting into action your resolution not to sin again. Develop strategies and tactics to outwit the Tempter.

 

Be assured of my prayers for every one of you, every day, that your lives may be free from the entrapments of sin and temptation and that you may know the embrace and kiss of the Father.

 

Mgr. Peter Magee, Parish Priest